Romeo and Juliet is a Lie!

As a little girl, I read stories that painted love so perfectly that I always dreamt of how beautiful it will be that day when my prince will come and steal my heart away.

I constantly dreamt of my “happily ever after” with my Prince Charming until I read Shakespeare’s  Romeo and Juliet. Chai! All my love dreams were shattered and then I suddenly dreaded even the thought of love. “If their love was so true and beautiful, why did they both have to die?” I never stopped asking myself.

Then, Brick and Lace now came to spoil everything with “Love is Wicked”. The world has painted love in many awful colours. Love has become constantly associated with pain, sorrow and tragedy but in my experience, I have not so learnt love. I found out when I met the Prince of my heart that love is not pain.

Every moment I spend with him always floods my heart with peace and confidence. Yes! Confidence. I am sure of his love and his plans for my life. In his arms, I always feel protected and secure. He taught me that Romeo and Juliet is a fraud! With him, I learnt that:

“Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
Love never faileth…”
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (KJV)

I understand that we are human and we all have flaws but don’t resign to a life of frustration and pain in the name of love. God still has sons and daughters that can love you right. Loveth,  it’s not okay if he says he loves you but he beats you blue and black at the slightest provocation because love is not easily angered. Abi, Brick and Lace deceived you too? Abeg, love is not wicked jare.

Ife, you should not be quiet if he treats you like trash. Remember, an object is treated based on the perception of its value. You are worth more! Tife, be reminded that love is patient. If he cannot wait till you get married before unzipping his pants, I advice you to “piante!”. Girl, run as fast as your legs can carry you.

Titilai* is a very long time to spend in torture! Love yourself enough to walk away when you still can.

I have found love in Jesus and it is beautiful! And as far as human love is concerned, I would settle for nothing less than the peace and strength his love offers. When God writes your love story, it will not end with a poisoned sword neither will it end with a divorce or a child custody battle because when Jesus is truly involved, it always has a beautiful ending.

Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

*Titilai means forever

5 thoughts on “Romeo and Juliet is a Lie!”

  1. "Love suffereth long". This write up is really beautiful. But as clearly indicated in your first description of love, LOVE IS PAIN. It is only dreamy to think that you can love someone(even yourself) without feeling pain. Even loving God comes with it's attendant pain and to refuse to accept this sets you up for a real heartbreak.

    Love endures pain, denial and persecution. It endures difficulty, sins and offences, it 'is not easily provoked', ' thinketh no evil' and 'endureth all things'.

    Clearly, it is seen that if you really want to love right, you have to see it for its beauty but not with rose coloured glasses; even a rose has its thorns.

    God first showed us his love by enduring ALL the pain we caused him till he lost his son's life for our sake. He certainly felt pain when he was betrayed by Adam and all his descendants including you and I. He still feels pain till date but his love is unfaltering.

    This suggests that true love for another person is the willingness to feel pain for the sake of love and still continue to love. Proverbs 10:12 says, 'Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins.'

    I actually mean to support your write up but we have to face the fact about true love. It's beauty a lot of times lies in the pain experienced. It is easy to love someone who loves you back, ultra easy in fact. It isn't easy to love someone who breaks your heart but God has proven that it is possible, generous and glorious.

    Remember, whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. In final words, to love God is the most important commandment but by extension, you cannot do this without obeying the second most important commandment; to love your neighbour.

    Jesus declared, "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbour as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commandments."

    Once you free yourself and accept that loving a flawed human being like yourself can involve pain, you free yourself to enjoy the essence of love, just as Jesus still loved his persecutors while he was on the cross. Imagine BEGGING for the forgiveness of your killers while you are dying. I have seen many pictures of Jesus on the cross and in every single one, he was in pain, but I did not see sadness in any.

    So, Love involves pain but holds no space for SADNESS.

    Finally as I read in one of the published romantic novels, a man was asked by his friend whether he was scared to marry his fiancée and spend the rest of his life (titilai) with her. Her responded that he was indeed scared to enter into the unending relationship but he was even more scared not to go ahead with the marriage.

    Not that she was causing him any real trouble but any one who is about to perform a great feat of love always has cold feet. Even Jesus did. But this man preferred to endure the thoughts of future suffering rather than the though of living without his heartthrob.


  2. Thanks for your comment. Nice exposition but I will like to insist that love is not pain. Sacrifice is a better word to convey the message you are trying to pass across because it is almost axiomatic that you cannot love without sacrifice. Jesus loved us and he sacrificed himself for us on calvary and I am not underestimating the fact that the cross was a burden but the point of this article is that as a lady you should not stay in an abusive relationship in the name of love.

  3. Wonderful. Thanks for your very constructive response. Maybe sacrifice better conveys the message. An alternative bottom line to my comment is that there is no gain without pain.

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